This is an online version of questions and resources part of a local holiday support gathering, provided for those unable to join us in person. Use the materials on your own or invite someone to join you. Questions? Feedback? Email me! Pat@C3LifeCoach.com Wishing you well, Pat
What do you want? Not in your stocking — for yourself! Amidst the glare of culture and pull of the past, we may forget we have choices ... that whatever our circumstances, we can create moments of joy for ourselves in our own way, not just during the holiday season but every day.
Curious? Ready to dream up some possibilities? Today, we’ll start by considering how we might ease the stress of approaching events, take some time to think about what you want, then consider how we can prepare to enjoy the moments as best we can.
EAsing the Approach
Start by thinking of your favorite holiday, and then what drew you here today.
What do I believe?
The holiday season brings us choices, often clouded by traditions and amplified by our personal histories. As a child we learned the meaning of tradition, as a youth the importance of keeping traditions, as a young adult what was valuable to us, as a couple the need for balance, and with personal loss the complexity of honoring the past while discovering new.
● Traditions are not meant to be hard and fast, unbending uncomfortable burdens that make you or others feel left out.
● Traditions are support to be a source of identity, bring magic/light into your life, be powerful and uplifting, be done with purpose, provide reassurance, and be what you make of them.
Take a few minutes to answer the following questions, not just thinking in your head but in writing or verbally to yourself or others.
● What do I see as the purpose of traditions?
● How important is it for me to honor the past?
● What do I see as the role of discovering new?
What do I want for myself this holiday season?
One of the best ways to make the most of the holidays is to notice how we are thinking about ourselves, the holiday, and our situation. Although it may seem we have the same thoughts, discovering new insights can shift our perspective and move us new directions.
Take a few minutes to answer the following questions.
● My Self: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is my level of well-being? Where would I like it to be?
● The Holiday: What does this holiday season mean to me? What is most important to me?
● The Situation: What am I seeking for myself? What am I hoping to experience?
Continue exploring by answering these questions.
● What moments do I remember most fondly?
● What do I need to let go of?
● What possibilities intrigue me most?
Reflecting
Take a minute to answer the following question.
● What was most meaningful / valuable to me so far? What’s my next step?
Resources
Worksheet Easing the Approach taking care of yourself, discovering insights, and exploring how you want to feel
Worksheet A Closer Look at how you are feeling now versus how you want to be
Worksheet Possibilities for how you might get what you want, what you might needs, and what support would be helpful
Article After The Loss Of A Loved One, Your Holiday Traditions Change But Hope Endures by National Public Radio
enjoy the Moment
On the day, we may be nervous about how the day will unfold. It helps to prepare for challenges and the unexpected.
What are my possibilities?
Being aware of what we’re seeking enables us to recognize and be open to opportunities.
Take a few minutes to express your ideas (writing, talking, drawing, etc.)
● What do I want to get out of the holiday season?
● What might this look like?
o How would I prefer to spend time (with who, where, doing what)?
o How would I honor the past?
o How would I create new memories /traditions?
How can I prepare to enjoy the moment?
Preparing helps us navigate the situation, make wise choices in the moment, and nurture our resilience.
Take a few minutes to answer these questions.
● How might I follow through what I seek?
● What will I need?
● What challenges do I anticipate? How can I prepare?
Reflecting
Take a minute to answer the following question:
● What was most meaningful / valuable to me today?